whatever.

I have yet to have the implosion of all my known friends and enemies from the local 'social network' in on the fact that i am in fact blogging. Here is where I will talk to no one but still talk about my personal life where I know I have things to express to people but really I feel at this point in my life i should keep my damned mouth shut.

In fact more than anything else I think I need to temper this rampant mouth of mine. Yah poetry cool but painful things happen to people when I get on a roll and really its time for me to stop it. iRage

So anyways you look blown out. Did alot of things I regret because now looking at you makes me a little sad.
You should get over it. I can't help what happened because it already did happen and if I could go back I would do the same thing over again

Oh I like this mask. Very comfortable already.. Lets get it all out shall we?

Now what is this you say about perfection and now nothing? Is this your insanity you need therapy for? I don't think those people you are surrounded by can help you and if they could I think they already would have. Haven't they been great? You said some things you probably didn't mean to me. Like 'i haven't been happy since I got here, this is the first time I have been happy'

Now for me I agree in some ways and others not. I've been very happy. Overjoyed in fact for about two months strait and I can't say it has alot to do with the people you are surrounded by or socializing with them. Its just too crowded and there are too many self interests involved.

They are running you. Choose the chains you have holding you down and run from me because yes I am gonna cause a conflict when you say those sweet things that could and will mean so much in the months to come. I suppose it could be over but I have that sneaking suspicion in the back of my mind that it isn't. False start for sure and yes I'll do my best to put all my random thinking right here where I don't have to inflict it upon you. I'll keep singing our song.. shit ill put it on now. You will hear it when I'm done, or you'll have to push me away harder than you have pushed away anything because it is a gift to you for the gift you gave me. Thank god I work fast I used you for what I needed

Thawing. Yes I was hard and cold and lost all of my hope and I know now that it is out there and that I can reach out and have it. I will have it I know it even if it isn't you because I know what you are and I know what I am looking for and what I need.

I'll keep drawing and thinking and being passionate even if its just a dream and even if I can't share it with you I will display it to everyone and in that way know that there is a chance that maybe you will see it.