Saturday, February 11, 2012
I'll keep treating you like a good friend cause you are, not because I am obligated to. Sometimes I seem to make you really really mad and it bums me out. Can't keep telling yourself I intentionally ruined your friendship with nessa. We go out of our way to avoid you two meeting up, but in about 6 months that will be impossible to avoid. I really think you have this need to see me as a criminal, a demon [odd that you are so polite in person but seem to secretly dispise and hate me] because if you recognized that over the time we have been seperate i did everything I could be inwardly correct the male driven selfish personality flaws within myself that kept us seperate, then you would see that a woman you know told you to stay away from me now desperately wants to stay around me. She simply did not know or understand how I would treat her. She was under the false impression that the man I was was the man you explained me to be by my actions, by my interactions with you which is simply not a valid way to view me. Not anymore as we both have changed.
My core is the same, I can't do any better by you and that is the truth. I failed to please you, as all of life seems in my eyes to fail to please you, except our child which fails to please no one. She is boss. We made that together and I am very proud of that and our relationship surrounding her. I will always love you Jade, because you are such a caring and lawful individual. I would kill for you and I would die for our child.