Saturday, September 24, 2011

waste of time to send this

whats fun is knowin you were on fb but didn't reply. I guess I understand as little about you as you do about me. Did it feel good to throw those words at me? Your anger gives me some sadness, anxiety, but I feel no guilt. I have been active and respectfully communicating with Vanessa over these six years. We kept from knowing eachother directly because we were dating our best friends which is no longer the case. You and Vanessa were not a couple, she did not cheat on you. SHE EVEN SAID SHE WAS COMING TO WASHINGTON and you didn't know she was coming to see me? I can believe we couldn't tell you after your reaction, The idea was to tell you slowly, we had spoken miles online, but once we spent time together in person, which we had never done ever before once, we knew that there was something tangible there. Your feelings? You are WITH RICHIE, you have someone, I didn't, and now I do and it is life changing! Your best friends [boy its a shame you don't see this] are so alike that they fell in love. I don't threaten Richie any longer as a desperate ex boyfriend, Vanessa isn't with a Debbie Downer. LIFE IS GOOD. We are happy and able and thankful. All my greatest joys have come from knowing you. AGAIN Anytime you want to be a part of our lives its cool. Doesn't change anything, we had a rushed 2 week period of time where a lot of bad things happen and when Vanessa needed your support breakin up with Bran you were SO BUSY thinking of your feelings that you dropped HER. YOU dropped YOUR best friend because of things a NOT best friend TOLD YOU. I hear you haven't even tried to talk it out with her.

Fucking be a man, face her and talk to her. She regrets the rush of our relationship, thus having to hide it but I can certainly take the blame for that. She was in pain and I knew I could help. The more we spoke the more I felt like I could lift her up.  It's not really about me, its about Vanessa. She's impulsive sometimes. She makes mistakes. She is encourage able but she means well. Did what had to be done at the time there was no other choice.

She really loves me, says I am nothing like she pictured and I agree. My image of her was a little different. I am still not sure how PAST NOT TELLING YOU this will have any negative effect upon your life Jade.

Only positive points.


  1. Hi,

    Apologies for the off-topic comment, but I couldn't find a contact email for you.

    I recently put out an ebook of my writing, called 'The New Death and others'. It's a collection of short pieces, mostly dark fantasy.

    I was wondering if you'd be interested in doing a review on your blog.

    If so, please email me: Let me know what file format is easiest for you, and I'll send you a free copy.

    You can also download a sample from the ebook's page on Smashwords: